Do Your Words Build Up or Tear Down?

Say What Will Build Another Up

When you talk about controversial things, do your words build up or tear down those whose opinions don’t match your own? Do you feel justified in “ripping a new one” to someone you feel has wronged you? Do you share memes online that are digs at others you feel are stupid, or do you sarcastically comment on Facebook posts or tweets to show how you are right and the other person is wrong? I know I would have to answer yes to at least one of these things. We can justify it as being human nature, though, right?

A few weeks ago, I went to church with my mom when I was up visiting family, and the pastor was talking about stress.

His first point was The Stress of a Compromising Situation and how integrity is so important. The supporting scripture for that source of stress was Proverbs 10:9: “People with integrity have a firm footing, but those who follow crooked paths will slip and fall.” and Proverbs 23: 17-18: “Don’t envy evil men but continue to reverence the Lord all the time, for surely you have a wonderful future ahead of you.” Integrity is one of the principles that Jonathan and I have as one of the pillars of our business. It is why we also try to never burn bridges, even when the other party has lit their half on fire. You never know when you – or they – will need help.

The second point was The Stress of Conflict. I know I am one of those who hates conflict to the point that it can trigger my anxiety issues. It is worse when it is a family situation, but really, I hate all conflict. The supporting passages for this source of stress were some that I hadn’t read in awhile, but they really spoke to my heart. Matthew 5:9: “Blessed are the peacemakers for they will be called ‘Sons of God’.” and Proverbs 18:20: “You will have to live with the consequences of everything you say” both apply today, especially when you look at the conversations people are having on social media. The other two passages are the ones that I have thought about regularly over the last month. Phillipians 2:3-6: “Don’t be selfish. Be humble. Don’t think only about your own affairs. Be interested in others too and what they are doing. Your attitude should be the same that Christ Jesus had. Though He was God He did not demand and cling to His rights.”  Wow! Think about that in the context of your online relationships. Then there was the passage that I used in the photo above – but from a different translation. Ephesians 4:29-32: “Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful so that your words will be an encouragement. Get rid of all the bitterness and rage and anger and harsh words and slander. Instead be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another just as God through Christ has forgiven you.” What would happen if we all stopped to think about our words, and tried to build each other up or encourage one another instead of tearing each other down to make ourselves look good. I have been trying to put this into practice over the last few weeks, and I can tell you, it makes me feel good when I know I’ve made someone else feel good. It also makes me feel good when I don’t participate in the negative feeding frenzies on Facebook and Twitter. Let me be clear…we don’t have to “go there” when interacting on social media. We don’t have to participate in the ugly to advocate for agriculture. We don’t need to be the one to make the consumer who is asking the question feel stupid, and we certainly don’t need to be calling them uneducated or whatever the latest insult is. We don’t have to go there!

The final point that the pastor had was The Stress of Competition. I don’t know about other agriculture advocates, but I tend to listen to sermons and pull out things as they pertain to advocating, and how to do it in a Christ-like manner. The final point here was another one that correlates so well to the advocating we do. I really appreciated this passage as how it relates to the stress of competition and conversations we have online. Galatians 6:4: “Let everyone be sure to do his very best for then he will have the personal satisfaction of work done well and he won’t need to compare himself with somebody else.” Isn’t it the goal of every farmer and rancher to do their very best? If you do the very best you can on the ground you farm or with the animals you raise, you won’t need to compare yourself with somebody else. We are all unique in how we manage our resources, but we are not unique in the fact that we all are doing our very best in the work we’ve chosen to do. How’s that for a little stress relief?

My challenge to you is, before you hit the share button on a meme, or comment on a thread, take a second to decide if that meme or your words are meant to build up those you are communicating with, or if they are meant to tear them down. My hope is that your words will be an encouragement.

 

 

**Thanks for the inspiration, Pastor Rick Krasky of Anoka Covenant Church.

A Day to Count Blessings

Carolyn's Baby Photo
My baby photo. Liked the spiked hair then, too!

I love birthdays. As a kid, birthdays meant cake, presents, and being made to feel special for a whole day. As a grown up, birthdays are still fun, but I like to take time to count my blessings as well.

A year ago, Jonathan and I were taking foster parent classes. It was a 12 week commitment, right in the middle of harvest. We made it work, and we became certified in March. At the beginning of October, we received our first long term placement. This little guy has turned our lives upside down, but I feel grateful for the opportunity to love and nurture him until he is able to go back home, or until he is adopted. Days may get stressful, and I may feel like I am failing at parenting, but I know God has a bigger plan at work here.

Jonathan and I were able to do a lot of traveling this year, and I am thankful for all of the people we were able to hang out with. We had an awesome time in San Antonio, TX at the American Farm Bureau Annual meeting, where I was able to meet some of my online friends in person for the first time. We are so happy that we took the opportunity to get to know some of our Minnesota Young Farmer and Rancher contestants better while hanging out and discussing golf one evening. These awesome farmers and farm professionals are why I have faith that agriculture in Minnesota will be in good hands for years to come.

Following our stop in San Antonio, we went a bit further south to visit our migrant workers and their families. We have two families that come up and work for us every year. One family has worked for close to 10 summers for us. They have become more than just employees. They are also our friends. We loved visiting them and seeing where they come from. I think we could all use a little of their attitudes toward hospitality. We were so warmly welcomed!

In August, I attended the AgChat Foundation’s Cultivate and Connect conference in Austin, TX. You can read about my 10 Takeaways by clicking on the link. I was pretty much starstruck the entire time. So many people I wanted to meet in real life…and so many people I hadn’t met online yet…the conference was filled with awesome people! I have been so blessed by the friendships I have made with agvocates all over the world (I now have some Aussie friends! Lol) I still think about the keynote addresses, the breakout sessions, the networking…let’s just say, I can’t wait to go again!

Probably the biggest blessing this year was an addition to our family…in the form of my son-in-law, Doug. I have been praying for him since Anna was little, and God totally delivered. I could not ask for a more compassionate, Godly man for Anna. Their wedding day was perfect, and their ceremony was filled with so much love. Most of all, I am happy to see Anna so happy.

Yes, this year has been filled with lots of good things. It wasn’t all rainbows and unicorns, but the blessings smoothed out those bumps. 🙂

Here’s looking to year number 4(cough)!

tonymillerphotography
The “new” Olson family. We welcomed Doug into the family in June

 

10 Takaways from AgChat’s Cultivate and Connect

Last week I had the opportunity to travel to Austin, Texas for AgChat’s Cultivate and Connect conference. This was a gathering of over 140 people from all over the United States, Canada, and Australia. It was a wonderful mix of accents and agricultural backgrounds. I loved meeting so many awesome people in person that I have talked farming with over social media for a long time. For some, it was as if we’ve been neighbors for years.

The whole conference was centered around helping us to tell our agriculture story more effectively. We had great keynote speakers: Thom Singer opened the conference, and really fired us up. Katie Uhlaender, an Olympic skeleton athlete and rancher from Kansas gave us some things to think about while she was telling her story. Montana Logger Bruce Vincent closed the conference, telling us how important it is to get our stories out there, and lead from the front. I also attended four breakout sessions, and had the opportunity to tour North America’s largest Whole Foods, which was founded in Austin.

I like making lists to help me process my thoughts after attending inspiring conferences like this one. I thought I would share 10 takeaways with you, to help you see the conference from my perspective.

10. Agvocates are Awesome! Every single person I met was exactly how I thought they would be. We all have a passion for telling our stories, so there was never a lull in the conversations. I just wish I was able to spend more time with more people. Two days just wasn’t enough to see everyone I wanted to see!

9. Every Agvocate should attend at least 1 AgChat event. Where else can you go, see someone in person for the first time, and immediately go up to them and give them a huge hug? I swear, some of them could be my long lost relatives. This feeling of “you look so familiar” was common, even with people I wasn’t following on social media. If meeting your fellow #AgNerds isn’t enough, the training available, and the expertise amongst the AgChat Foundation board members and fellow attendees makes the whole stress of traveling worth it. I’m not a good flyer…and this was my first time booking a ticket and flying by myself. The experience was totally worth the stress!

8. The City of Austin is cool…and a lot like agriculture. This was my first time staying in Austin, and only the 2nd time I had been there at all. Austin is one of those cities that amazes me. The first night we went to an upscale foodie type restaurant, and the last night it was a taco bar. We ate at a food truck for one of our conference meals, and at our banquet we had a delicious taste of Austin. There were so many great choices, that it was hard to decide which establishment I wanted to try when given the chance. The whole area was a mix of culture, taste, music, and attitude which gave the whole city a vibe that made it one of those experiences I won’t soon forget. If you were to remove one of those elements, the city wouldn’t be as exciting. That’s where it is a lot like agriculture. We have a mix of culture, taste, attitude, and styles that gives ag a great vibe. It is necessary to have a wide range of choices for our consumers, so they can choose what part they want to experience at any given time.

7. Listening to our consumers may get uncomfortable. What does it mean to you when you hear the phrase, “We need to listen to our consumers”? We had a blogger, a journalist, and a chef who really have little to no connection to agriculture speak. The blogger was in a breakout session that I did not attend, but she has been good about participating in more Q&A online following the conference. The other two were part of a panel, along with a registered dietician who does have a connection to agriculture. The conversation got uncomfortable at times, as we heard things being said about agriculture that are completely different than what we see, and it was hard to not get really upset. We really needed to go into the situation with an open mind in order to better understand where those consumers were coming from. We aren’t really listening to our consumers if we’re busy forming rebuttals to what they say while they are speaking.

6. Our consumers are smart – they don’t need educating.  How many times have you heard…or uttered the phrase…they just need to be educated, then they’ll accept my type of farming? Many of the consumers that “need educating” are college graduates. I don’t have a college degree, so how can I imply that I am smarter than they are? That’s kind of presumptuous, isn’t it? Taking an air of superiority isn’t going to foster a relationship built on trust. As we heard from one speaker, we need to engage, not educate.

5. For every negative story, we need 6 positive stories to break even. It’s easy to see how many people are so depressed when you listen to the news. Every story is so negative. It gets to the point where you never want to watch the news again. Negativity sells. This is why it is so important to get positive agriculture stories out there. We may not see an increase in corn prices because we blogged about the new calves that were born last night, or about how a combine works, but is that the only reason to blog? We need to get so many good stories about agriculture out there that we are the first choice on search engines when someone is asking why a goat eats cans.

4. We have awesome stories. I loved a point that Bruce Vincent made. He talked about how we are not perfect, but we have great stories to tell. He also stated that, “Rural cultures need a trusted ‘human face’ to share our story…that story is yours.” How much more convincing do we need? I would love it if more farmers were tweeting or sending Facebook updates from their fields, barns, and pastures. I want to hear the stories as much as anyone. When our consumers are ready to hear, give them something to read!

3. You’ll never know when you’ll need someone in your network. This was a major point made by Thom Singer. We never know when we meet someone how they will impact our lives. I know that the people I hung out with before and after the conference have made a huge impact on me already. They are my mentors and my peers. It is important to keep up those relationships, because you never know when you might need them.

2. We cannot attack others in agriculture because they don’t do it our way. Nothing makes me upset more than agvocates putting down other agvocates because they do things differently. Why perpetuate the negative stories or assumptions when you have such an awesome positive story to tell? When agvocates let their differences take over, they lose out on relationships with some pretty darn good people.

1. Building relationships takes time and work, but it is worth it! I joined Twitter 2 years ago so I could participate in AgChat on Tuesday nights. I met some pretty fun people because of those chats, and gained a lot of new social media friends. That led to my very first AgChat conference, and regional event held in Minnesota…which ultimately led to attending the Cultivate and Connect conference in Austin. It was easy to work on those relationships, as I would encounter them regularly during chats or when posting about my farm. We were challenged by Thom Singer to work on our relationships, and be the one to reach out and say ‘hello’. Be prepared, my friends. I’m looking forward to more conversations, and building more relationships with both #AgNerds and consumers.

I’d like to thank the AgChat Foundation board for working so hard at making this conference a positive experience!

The "Bat Bridge" in Austin, Texas. 1.5 million Mexican Tailless Bats live there!
The “Bat Bridge” in Austin, Texas. 1.5 million Mexican Tailless Bats live there!

 

We’re Called to Be a Blessing

CarolynCares Called to be a Blessing

I receive a text every morning from my DailyBible app. Since I am not a morning person, and prefer to ease into my day, I lie in bed and read the notifications on my phone before rising. Sometimes the verses that are sent are not really uplifting at the time, but yesterdays really stuck with me. These verses in 1 Peter are still very applicable today…or maybe even more so with some of the things I’ve been reading online lately.

I hope you ponder these verses before you post an angry reply, or zing someone that thinks differently than you do. Instead, think of how you can be a blessing to that person. ‘…repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called…’

 

Loving the Good – A Challenge

CarolynCares Love One Another

Our scripture texts for this week’s mid-week Lenten service have been on my mind all day. The first reading was from Micah 6, with verse 8 really standing out. “He has told you, O mortal, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?” That sounds so simple, doesn’t it?

The second reading was from Romans 12:9-13. The photo above contains the portion of the text that has stayed with me today. Again, the words sound so simple. “Don’t just pretend that you love others: really love them.” Another version says, “Let your love be genuine.”

When was the last time you showed real love for others? Too often we say one thing, but are thinking another. We say things to please or appease our audience, thinking they will like us if we say what we think they want to hear. Is popularity the driving force behind posts, or is it an outpouring of what is truly in your heart?

Everyone sees things thorough their own filter. My reality is different than your reality. In my opinion, that is the way it should be. I think where things go wrong, is when we feel our way is the only way. When we insist that we are the only “right” ones, we are not really loving others. We cannot honor each other if we are too busy judging them based on our own set of rules as to what is right.

My mind tends to connect scripture lessons and snippets of Pastor’s sermons to things happening in agriculture.  Lately, I haven’t been feeling much love on social media when it comes to agriculture. So many articles, memes, blog posts, tweets, statuses, whatever, have been divisive. If you don’t agree with this person, you are a shill. If you don’t agree with that person, you are anti-scienceIf you choose to eat this food, you are an elitist. If you choose to eat that food you are poisoning your family. Read my 10 truths about this farming system that I have no experience in, but am writing about anyway. Sometimes I just want to bang my head on the wall! One thought from Pastor’s sermon seemed to fit into these feelings. We want a set of rules to follow, yet we don’t all agree on the rules. The rules were made to make order out of chaos, yet now we have chaos because we don’t like the rules. It helps to explain church denominations…yet the same can be said for agriculture. There is no one hard and fast rule about how to grow things…or even what things to grow. Yet, we want to separate people into categories, and we judge them based on which category we put them into. Doesn’t make a lot of sense, does it?

This is the part where I’m really thankful for grace and forgiveness. As much as I try to live like these scripture passages say, I know that I will fail. That doesn’t mean that it’s okay to give up on trying! Some days, being kind is awfully difficult. That is when I need to hate the wrong…the wrong being my attitude. Some people like to make loving them more of a challenge, but when you are loving the good, you can usually find something to love. 🙂

My challenge to you, is to work on really loving others, and focus on the positives when you write. Think about how your post might be perceived by those who do not live in your box. Was the post written with good intentions, or was it written because others have posted on this topic and received a good response?

The power to change the attitude of the multitude begins with one…you. Love the good!

 

Kindness…

People are getting testy. Maybe it’s the weather, or maybe I’m just letting it get to me a little more. I’m not sure.

This past week, the new Farm Bill was finally passed by both the House and the Senate, and was signed into law by President Obama. Many in agriculture are breathing a sigh of relief…and many are whining and venting on social media. The Farm Bill is not perfect. There are areas where we still need to work with our elected officials to make changes as stand alone legislation. The key is, we need to WORK WITH our elected officials. Calling them names, shaming them on social media, and calling their offices in moments of anger is NOT working with them.

When kids at school were giving me a bad time, my mom used to tell me to kill them with kindness. There are even references in the Bible that talk about being kind to your enemies. Sweet words soothe crying babies, help comfort broken hearts, and bring calming to those who may be acting out in frustration. I have seen it work many times. I have also seen people shrink away and become defensive when angry words are hurled at them. The power of words is amazing.

I may not agree with, or even really like some of my elected officials, but if I want to have a working relationship with them, I must treat them with kindness and respect. That includes communications with them on social media, in emails, or in person.  I truly believe that burning bridges is one of the worst things I can do as an advocate for agriculture. Badgering public officials on something I don’t agree with is not going to make them jump to my aid if I need them to side with me on another issue.

The same could be said for belittling those who may not agree with your farming style, or your food choices. If we want our consumers to know that we have the safest, most affordable food supply in the world, why are we constantly fighting between ourselves in public? We are our own worst enemies. We spend so much time accusing the “other side” of using junk science, or emotion to justify their opinions, that we have failed to show just how good our farms are. We have failed to show the reasons why we raise our animals the way we do. We have failed to show how many families are out working every day so we all have plenty to eat. Just think of how awesome it would be if we stood up for one another, or promoted agriculture as a whole. Chipotle and Panera’s ad campaigns wouldn’t have a (chicken) leg to stand on.  Let’s not burn bridges between farmers. Farmers that need to come together to make changes in immigration reform, or mCOOL, or township ordinances…

The quote that I put on the photo below fit so well with how I was feeling this week watching my social media feeds. Instead of being frustrated or angry, I am going to focus on being kind. Maybe, just maybe, it will catch on! Want to join me?

CarolynCares Kindness

30 Days of Thanksgiving – Day 22: Technology

CarolynCares Technology

Have you ever driven past a field and noticed that the person driving the tractor didn’t have their hands on the steering wheel? Look for a globe similar to the one on the left, and you will know that they are using AutoSteer technology.

Jonathan and I have been using the AutoSteer system for about 5 years. We like to use the same wheel tracks for planting, dragging, rotary hoeing, and cultivating to reduce soil compaction. This system allows us to do that. If you look at the right hand photo, you will see lines on the monitor. We are able to skip lines when we’re working so we don’t have to turn as tight. The dark blue areas are where we’ve been, and the gray is where we need to go yet. The system allows us to record every pass in the fields, so we can keep records of planting dates, and weed control dates.

The GreenStar system works on our combine, and uses the same globe and monitor. We are able to record our yields…when the yield monitor is working…as well as use the AutoSteer. This year, I was very thankful for the whole guidance system. We had a wind storm that blew many acres of corn down in our county, including ours. Being able to set the combine on a line and not worry about staying on the row made harvesting the downed corn a lot easier! Some of my friends and family will think I’m mostly thankful for the AutoSteer so that I can text, Tweet, and Facebook. Really, that is just the icing on the cake.

 

To follow other 30 Day Blog Challenge participants, click here.

30 Days of Thanksgiving – Day 18: Social Media

CarolynCares Social Media

Facebook. Twitter. Blogging. Instagram. Pinterest. Snap Chat. Skype. These are all platforms I use to keep in contact with family and friends all over the world. I am thankful that I can share Facebook messages with family members who live in Mongolia, Italy, and Malaysia. They don’t seem quite so far away when you can communicate almost instantaneously.

Through Twitter, I have met many farmers from the United States, Canada, and Australia. Some I have met in person, some I will meet eventually, and others will only be an online friendship. I have also learned about opportunities to give back, like #foodthanks, where we are encouraged to give Food Thanks this Thanksgiving season. Follow the link to see how you can get involved. I plan on donating a bag of food to our school. They distribute food to needy children every Friday so the kids will have something to eat over the weekend.

You all know how I feel about blogging… 🙂 As much as I love to talk, and to write, this challenge has been…challenging. It really makes me think about why I am thankful for everything I am focusing on. Truth be told, there have been a few things that I had on my list that moved way down on the importance list. After contemplating them, I realized those things were just little things. I may still be thankful for them, but I didn’t want to focus on them this month.

I’m not a super regular Pinner on Pinterest, and I mainly have recipes or food related things there. It is a handy place to keep my online recipes when I’m making larger dinners. I hope to add a few more non-food boards this winter, some photography related, and some farm related.

Snap Chat is reserved for communicating with my daughters. Sometimes it is a series of goofy faces, or it may be a “does this look okay together” question. Yes, I ask my youngest daughter clothes questions all the time. She has a great eye, and she knows my style better than I do.

I really haven’t used Skype much in the last year. When Jonathan and Laura were in Tanzania, we would communicate through Skype, but it was voice only. Skype is nice to see family members in real time at Christmas. I’m hoping we’ll be able to see my brother’s family in Italy, and our German exchange daughter over the holidays.

I am a horrible letter writer, and I’m really bad at sending birthday cards, so I am thankful for the ability to keep in contact with family and friends so easily through social media!

 

To follow other 30 Day Blog Challenge participants, click here.

30 Days of Thanksgiving – Day 12: AgChat

AgChatFoundationLogo_RGB

Some of you may be thinking “what in the world is AgChat, and why is Carolyn thankful for that?” AgChat is the reason I joined Twitter. I have made many friends from all over the world by participating in Twitter #AgChat conversations on Tuesday evenings.

There is much more to the AgChat Foundation than just the weekly Twitter chats. In February, I attended a regional conference where I was able to meet some of the people I had been communicating with over social media. You could choose from different presentations on improving your blogging, photography, Facebook fan pages, Twitter, and more. The networking and learning sessions were great for encouraging us to tell our stories using more than one social media platform. The Portland Regional Conference is coming up, so if you live in the Pacific Northwest, I encourage you to check it out!

The AgChat Foundation also encourages us to give back when possible. Next week starts the annual #FoodThanks celebration. This year, we have been asked to show our appreciation for good food, and to those who grow it, by using the #FoodThanks hashtag while sharing photos of food or recipes online. I plan on pledging to donate a bag of food this holiday season. For more ideas on how to share your Food Thanks this holiday season, check out the #FoodThanks website.

I am really thankful that my friend, Emily, introduced me to the AgChat Foundation. I am thankful for all of the people I have met while participating in the AgChats on Tuesdays (and #FoodChat on the 3rd Tuesday). Thanks to you all for putting up with me!

For more 30 Day Challenge Blogs, click here.

 

 

30 Days of Thanksgiving – Day 7: Farmers

CarolynCares Farmer

I learned to be thankful for farmers by watching and listening to my grandpas. One was still actively farming with an uncle when I was growing up, and the others had retired. (I had three sets of grandparents, due to my birth mother’s death when I was 2.) Watching my one grandpa come in from feeding the animals in the morning, washing up with the Lava soap at the sink just inside the kitchen door before sitting down for breakfast, all with a smile, made a huge impression on me. We were given jobs to do when we stayed with grandpa and grandma, which helped to teach me a tiny bit of the work that goes into farming. Our jobs were easy at our grandparent’s, since we were from the city. We learned a little more about taking care of farm animals from our cousins who lived a couple of miles away. They had dairy cows for awhile, as well as pigs. We learned how to take care of calves, and how they milk the cows. I was always fascinated by that, and wanted to be able to take care of my own animals some day. That wish came true when we started raising pigs in 1989.

As an adult, I’ve learned that farmers come in all shapes, sizes, colors, genders, religious, and political beliefs. Their farms are very diverse, growing everything from apples to zucchini.  The one thing they have in common, is an appreciation for the land and animals in their care. Some days the work is difficult, and some days pretty easy. Even with all of the uncertainty with weather and commodity prices, farmers are a pretty optimistic bunch. There’s always tomorrow (sorry if you are now thinking of the song from “Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer), or there’s always next year are common phrases. I believe it is an attitude that is passed down through the generations. In the photo above, Jonathan’s great-grandfather, Daniel Olson, is working in the field. He moved his family up to our farm from Iowa in 1913. His wife and children probably had no idea what they were moving into. As we celebrated our farm’s 100th Anniversary this summer, we all were very thankful for that optimistic attitude that prompted them to seek a better farm.

In the 25 years I have lived and worked on the farm, I have learned how to communicate with other farmers. Many times, as I’m interacting with farmers from around the world through social media, I learn about a way of farming that I had never witnessed before. The food that they grow is one I like to cook or bake with, but had no idea how it was grown. I love when those farmers take the time to share their way of farming, and I am thankful that they care enough to share their stories.

To read more blogs written by farmers, check out Holly Spangler’s page, where she has compiled a list of other 30 day challenge bloggers.

Introduction to the 30 Day Challenge

Day 1: Family

Day 2: Harvest

Day 3: Music

Day 4: Bacon

Day 5: Flowers

Day 6: Coffee